Obsession, capitalism and the meaning of life

It's easy to be consumed by just about anything. The human brain is always in search of patterns and once it has the scent of a specific pattern puzzle, it wants to follow the trail through to the prize at the end. Unfortunately, there often is no prize. Very few things in life end. We may envision an end or a final outcome, but we rarely, if ever, get there and if or when we do, it's almost always not the end, but simply seemed like the end from far away. Life is a succession of events and the conclusion of one is also the beginning of another.

The gaming industry is often accused of designing games to get people hooked in order to make money. I doubt that there is a mastermind behind each game sitting at a big oak desk in a large corner office of an imposing building with steepled fingers and a maniacal laugh revelling in all the gamers that's keeping him rich. In a capitalist driven culture, money is of importance to everybody. Money makes the world go round, without it, companies go out of business and no more game. The more money made, the larger the safety buffer between the company and bankruptcy and the safer everyone feels. I'm sure drowning in money is fun too, but I don't think greed is the driving force behind capitalism. If there has to be a driving force, it's more likely to be ambition and money is simply the symbol of success at the end. Invariably, money is only crucially important to those who do not have plenty of it. I do think gaming is an easy addiction, but it's not designed that way because of anybody wishing to make money. It's designed that way because that's how the human brain works. Everything is an easy addiction. A quick glance at all the .... anonymous groups should make that clear.

I find that the more I play, the more I want to play and the less I play, the less important the game seems. It's always about just obtaining that next goal, just like it's always about just obtaining that next promotion at work, just obtaining that next mile on the treadmill, just obtaining that one more zero on a bank account and just obtaining that next house that's slightly larger than the last. It's always about finishing what we started which becomes deathly problematic when nothing actually finishes.

I don't eat all the food on my plate. When I'm full, I stop. I don't run when walking will do and I rarely chase the high of the next success. Chronic illness will do that to your outlook. It's the life lesson that hits back hard when you struggle against it. I spend a couple of hours playing on Saturday night to reach level 60 and get my first epic mount with a different faction than my own and I spent Sunday and probably the best part of today, recuperating. It seemed like a good idea at the time and a very bad one in retrospect as I partially dislocated multiple joints on Sunday as payment for my indulgence.

It's easy to be consumed by anything. The whole world is just a vast pattern and the trend setters are those who spot the relevant threads first. Success is standing on the edge of a precipice and obsession is taking one step forwards and toppling over. It's difficult to stop when everything seem to be within grasp, but alas, tomorrow is another day. I could have waited until Sunday to get my mount. It would not have been any less exciting. Or truthfully, it may have been a little less exciting but it also would have been a lot less painful. Life is a balancing act. Every act requires a certain regularity for it to be successful. Life is about slowly chipping away at multiple points. It's not about tunnelling through one spot. Or maybe it is. Maybe success does require a certain single mindedness, but I can't see what level of achievement would be worth the price of spending everyday hammering away at the same problem.

For me, life is about variety and balance. Working a little, relaxing a little, having a hobby, spending time with loved ones and having time to do things in a timely manner, without haste. It's also about the occasional moment of obsession, but I am still not convinced that giving in to those are a good idea. I think I would have been better off if the big events were a little smaller, but that begs the question - wouldn't life become extremely tedious?

If there is no giving it your all for the final stretch of the race, then there is no sense of achievement as you cross the finish line, no much deserved rest afterwards and no fun in the preparation for preparing the next. Should we always hold back? I am not for pushing ahead 24/7, but isn't the parts of life that's worthwhile the parts immediately after the achievement of a goal?

I think different temperaments require different strategies and I, I'm the less temperamental type. My life has plenty of unexpected upturns and downturns for me to want to add any more. The game, is just a game. I'd like to keep it that way.